HamsterRan!
by Reaper monkey
Summary: This is the script for a cartoon I made last week. HOWEVER, episode 2 and everything after wasn't in the script. It's new. OMFG!HAMSTERS ROCK!,is from a magazine I did for my friends. No flames,food or drinks while reviewing please.
1. Chapter 1

OMG!HAMSTERS ROCK!

This story is in "play" format.Please,reframe from getting confused.

* * *

Government Agent: Mr.President,we are ordering the pizza.

President: Excellent work,Mr. "The author is afraid he'll use a real agent's name and get shot."

Government Agent: No problem,but please,call me, "The".

Pizza man: Hello.This is Pizza Hut.

Government Agent: OMG!It's a terrorist!Or a Pizza Hut employee,it's kinda hard to tell.

Pizza man: Say goodbye to your country,you American infadel!

Government Agent: No,this is the president's country.

Pizza man: Put me on the phone with him!

'Hands phone to president'

President: Now listen close,and listen good,you terrorist scum!I want a large pepporoni pizza with olives,extra mushrooms,and don't forget the breadsticks this time!

Pizza man: If you don't get it before your country blows up,it's free!

'America blows up,leaving behind a lifeless wasteland'

Pizza man: Ah,man,not again!That's the sixth time this week!I'll never get that Mustang I want!

'Lays pizza next to lifeless corpse'

Pizza man:Well…bye…HAH!Too slow!I got your wallet!

Manager: Give it back!

Pizza man:But I-

Manager: Don't make me blow up ANOTHER car!

Pizza man: Okay,FINE!

Manager: Eh,I'll blow it up,anyway!

'Beep'

Manager: Oooops…I forgot…

Pizza man: What?

Manager: The bomb is on the delivery car!

Pizza man: Muhhamad,help us!

Muhhamad Ali: Yo!

'BOOM!'

* * *

RM:Soon,episode 2 will come,and then the apocalypse will arrive…NEXT EPISODE: What happens when Bill Gates trys to discover the secret recipe for Taco Bell's Taco Bell Grande'?Only time will tell.A shout out to:Anyone who leaves a review.If ya do,you'll be mentioned in the next one.Until then,you can all burn in Hell,Michigan!(An actual place) 


	2. Episode 2:PWND to the max!

I knew I would have to continue sometime,so here's episode 2!(I can feel your excitement)

* * *

'A long time ago,in a Taco Bell,far,far away,man discovered the mysterys of…The Taco Bell Grande',and one man had the duty to retrieve this very secretive and upheld secret'…

Frodo: I will get a Taco Bell Grande' value meal,and discover the secret recipe,although I do not know the way.

Gandalf: It's right past Main Street to your left.

Frodo: Thank you,oh wise wizard.

Gandalf:Don't think me,thank NEW Marvel Brand Popsicles!

Spider-Man: Marvel popsicles give me my energy!

Hulk: Steroids give me MY energy!

Captain America: You can't use steroids on a Cartoon Network commercial!

Wonder Woman: Wait,why the heck is Lord Of the Rings on Cartoon Network?

Captain America: You said heck!Now we'll get banned from Cartoon Network for sure!

'We are currently experiencing technical diffulcities.Please stand by'

'Elevator music starts playing'

Gandalf: But beware of the ever watching eye of Bill Gates!He's always looking for new ideas to poison peoples minds with,and trap them in his ever watching gaze!

Frodo:But I thought he was the top charity doner in the world!

Gandalf:Did you hear anything I just said?Now,hurry!

Frodo:Okay!...Wait,what about the-

'Frodo gets trampled by an orange car'

Bo: WHOO-HOO!Look at this critter we squahed!HUT!We squersed him good!Next time,let's run over a human!

Luke: I'm pickin'my nose!HUT!

To be continued…

* * *

RM:Parodys for:Lord Of the Rings,That Marvel popsicle commercial,and Dukes Of Hazzard.A shout to:LunaLuvgwood.Mrs.Buck,Mr.Buck,and all the other teachers in my school.Yes,you too,Ms.Delp. I hope you enjoyed this second episode.To any LOR fans,Marvel fans,or DOH fans,I'm not sorry for the rude parodys.I'm a HUGE Lord Of the Rings fan,but it's just for laughs.So,honestly,I can't say I'm sorry.Someone said the title should be changed,cuz'it has absolutely nothing to with hamsters.WEEEEEEEEEEL,TOO BAD!

(Yeah,I'm a cruel and degraving person)Next episode:Where do hobbits go in the afterlife?Where else but the matrix?


	3. Episode 3:One ring to destroy all tacos!

'Frodo falls into a deep pit of no return or hope'

Frodo: Is this my second wedding?

Neo: No,this is the Matrix.

Frodo: Yeah,her name was Julie…

Neo: Enough talk!He knows were here…

Frodo: Who,Julie?

Neo: It's a man…

Frodo: Yeeeeeaaaah…Now,is it Julie or not?

Neo: No,it's Bill Gates.

Frodo: OH MY GOSH!IT IS JULIE!

Neo: Nevermind…

Morphius: You have an important decision to make…

Frodo: No,Julie,I WON'T MARRY YOU AGAIN!I just can't re-experience the pain!

Morphius:NO!You must choose to stay and fight,or walk away forever…NOW…Will you choose…The Advil or the Tylenol?

Frodo: I can't believe I still carry Julia's stupid wedding ring around… "Ring to destroy all evil",my foot!

Morphius: Did you hear anything I just said?

Frodo: Hey,how'd I get in Canada?

Neo: NO,YOU DUMBARSE!THIS IS THE MATRIX!

'Awkward silence'

Frodo: Yeah,like I said,how'd I get in Canada?

To be continued…(Because,obviously,this got nowhere)

RM:YAY!Episode 3 is already finished!HAMSTERS!I'm bored…I'll go get a milkshake or something.Oh yeah,I can't make milkshakes…HamsterRan! Mascot(Hamster Tom):Why not go get one at a restaurant? Me:…Nah,it takes too long to get to the car…


	4. Chapte 4:Nails R rusty

Well,wooptity-doo!EPISODE 4!This one's so stupid,that I'm the only one who could think of it…

Interlude one:

Where: A Taco Bell.

Who: Bill Gates

When: Sometime yesterday,I think.

Nigga say what: NIGGA SAY HEY!

Bill Gates: I would like a Taco Bell Grande'value meal please.

Some poor guy from a hole in the ground (Michael Jackson and/or Taco Bell employee) :That'll be $1.00.

Bill Gates: A DOLLAR? YOU WENT UP OVER A PENNY!

"Guy": We haven't gone up since the bible was published.

'Bill Gates pulls out a bible'

Bill Gates: There's no copyright date.Eeeeh…Can't be older than the Wizard Of Oz."

"Guy": Sir,I…

Bill Gates: I'll use my power over the stock market to lower the prices!Eeeeeeeeeeeh…coughs I'm out of power.There must be kryptonite somewhere around here…

Manager #2: What's going on here?

Bill Gates: My arch-nemisis,Gary Walker!

Manager #2: Do I know you?

Bill Gates: You got the last copy of "Gone With the Wind" at Blockbuster!

Manager #2: Hey,rat-guts,give this guy the gas.

"Guy": I'm on it!

Bill Gates: Choking gas?

"Guy": No,it's the gas we use to make our nacho cheese dip!

Back to the story…

Henchman: You never even TASTED the taco?

Bill Gates: Shhhhhhh…My Soap's on! Eric,I'll save you!

'Bill Gates jumps and crashes into the T.V.'

Henchman #2: Let me guess.ANOTHER re-run of episode 27?

Henchman: SighsYeah.I'll get the broom.

Meanwhile:

Frodo: Why I'm I peeing in slow motion?

Neo: This is the matrix.

Frodo: I've been in here for half a day!By the time I'm done,I'll have to pee again!

Neo: It is our way.

Frodo: And look at you!You've been washing your hands since yesterday! Man,someones gonna think I'm constipated!

RM: Wow,that didn't get anywhere,either. HOW LONG CAN THIS STORY ARC LAST?


	5. Chapter 5

RM: 

Bill Gates: Yes. With this band-aid, I should heal in no time!

Agent #1: But sir, your skin completely burnt off, you have fatal brain damage, and your pulse is incredibly low. Do you REALLY think a regular band-aid can fix all that?

Bill Gates: No, but mine has Super-Man on it!

(Meanwhile, back at the matrix, we find our heroes drunk on the floor.)

Neo: Wanna see my guitar?

Frodo: Dude, YES!

Neo: It has a thick g-string with a nice, sharp impact.

Frodo: Are we talking about a guitar, or your Mom?

Neo: I'll kill you!

(Frodo dies.)

(Neo dies.)

(Bill Gates dies.)

(Sinbad's comedy act dies.)

(The theory that Hilary Clinton being a female dies.)

GAME OVER.

THE END. (Until Part 3.)

RM: 


	6. Chapter 6:Pudding Time

RM: After much effort, here's a little intro to part three. Luna, if it helps any, I still think you're a good person…But you shouldn't have messed with fudgemaster like that. Eh, whatever.

Some guy in a black hood: Helllllllllloooooooooo…

Prisoner: Are you God ?

Guy: No, I'm you're Mom. You're late for school.

Prisoner: What's this dark, horrible, prison?

Guy: Our bathroom. Now, quit taking a bath, and come on.

Prisoner: There's no bath in here!

Guy: What do you think the toilets for?

Prisoner: Washing my hands?

Guy: OUR toilets a two in one, remember?

Prisoner: Oh, yeah…

'A few minutes later'

Boy: Hey, Josh!

'The prisoner is now known as Josh'

Josh: Hey-

'He slips and falls into a gaping portal to hell'

Josh: Oh, THIS is how you get to the classroom!

Teacher: Josh, have a seat! Ahem. Today, we have a special guest. Osama Bin Laden!

Osama Bin Laden: I hope you like magic!

Class: YAY!

Teacher: I didn't know you were a magician!

Osama Bin Laden: Yeah, I WAS a karate teacher, but sometimes the children got hurt, and you know, I'M responsible for them, sooooooo yeah, it didn't work out…

RM: I'll finish it someday…


	7. Chapter 7:Pixie Sticks and Fairy Dust

RM: Oh yeah! The story's getting a little bit more mature this time around. Just deal.

Josh: Whoa! That was the best magic show ever! He made the Twin Towers disappear in the blink of an eye!

Big Headed Kid: So! Mike Tyson bit **SOMEONE'S EAR OFF**!

Josh: John, that's just a myth.

(The big headed kid is now known as John.)

John: Well, so is the tooth fairy!

Josh: The tooth fairy saved my life! If I didn't get that dollar to get a drink, I **WOULD'VE DIED OF THIRST!**

John: Well, see ya I guess.

Josh: Farewell, non-believer, farewell.

Satan: Today at a local high school, a magic show got out of hand, and I'm not going to wait until he pulls another dangerously flammable rabbit out of his hat before I do something about it!

Reporter: Mr. President, does this mean war?

(Satan is now known as George W. Bush.)

George W. Bush: Until I can think of another to devert attention away from the Paris Hilton sex scandal, yes. **OFF TO WAR, MEN!**

**To be continued…**

RM: (PWN)


	8. Chapter 8: This is it! Baby, I'm a fool

**THE EPIC FINAL CHAPTER**

Josh: My tummy huuurrrtttsss…

Ike Jr.: Nevermind that, Satan is attacking the city!

Josh: Don't worry, the Ghost Busters will save the day.

Ike Jr.: WHOO!

Josh: Wait, no they won't, they're not real.

**LET'S CALL THE POWER RANGERS**

The Power Rangers killed Satan. **YAY!**

**The End**


End file.
